I am sitting here weeping buckets. I was crazy enough to watch the video of one of my bloggy friends whose little daughter lived for a very short while. They knew she would be going to heaven shortly after her birth, and the video shows little Audrey being loved on by her mommy and daddy and her big sisters before (and after) she passes away.
I am missing Jenna so. A friend asked me straight out how my Christmas was at church tonight. I welcomed her question, but talking about Christmas and New Year especially stirred up some emotions that have been latent for a while.
I was poking around on Facebook last night when Jenna’s cousin in South Africa im’d me. We had a little chat and she told me what an impact Jenna had had on her life, even though they had just spent one afternoon together. She said: “Who could ever forget such a little petal?”
It blesses me to know that others miss and remember Jenna too. She was a little presence wherever she went and people were so drawn to her.
So in my weeping-buckets state, I went to my blog’s Jenna page to see some pictures of my little girl. It is the strangest thing. I look at her pictures, and I cannot help but smile. I smile into the eyes of a little girl whom I know is not dead. I know, when I look at her pictures, that Jenna wants me to know that she is alive and joyously happy and content, and she is with Jesus.
I miss her but I am not in despair. My girlie is not as far away as it seems.