She talks with her eyebrows

She does. Like her mama.

I used to be so enamoured with Jenna’s eyebrows. They were the perfect frame for those big blue eyes, and I loved staring at their exquisite shape when she was asleep next to me. But most of all, I loved them because they could talk. Those eyebrows said a lot. On the video that a sweet friend took of Jenna and I at a park day a few months before she left us, I noticed that my eyebrows talk too. Go figure.

I like to think that Jesus is just as enamoured with little Jenna, including her eyebrows, as he spends time with her up in heaven.  Perhaps she tells him things that he already knows, just like any child tells his/her parents, but because he loves her and loves being with her, he arches his eyebrows and says: “Wow! That is so cool! Tell me more.” I can’t imagine what heaven is like, but I know that there are relationships there and I am sure Jenna and Jesus are enjoying theirs.

I sat next to Sarah at the back of church yesterday and watched her ‘talking’ with baby Zoey. Here was Sarah, in her grown-up fullness, totally capable of having scintillating and eloquent conversation with her peers (when she isn’t making fart jokes, that is 🙂 ), taking the time to reciprocate the adoring gaze and precious coos of that helplessly dependent little girl on her lap. It was such a picture to me of our great and glorious and mighty God who steps down from that lofty place to meet us face to face and who takes the time to whisper sweet words in our hearing. And he delights when we return that gaze, and smile up at him.

So I did just that. Right there in church, sitting next to my Sarah friend, I turned the mental gaze of my heart to Jesus and smiled at him.  I could feel his pleasure in that simple act of worship, as he smiled back at me. Oh, sometimes I get so complicated and think I need to do this or do that to win God’s approval. But at times like these, I realise that his eyes are on me, his little sparrow, and he simply longs for me to have a relationship with him in spirit and in truth. And he knows every quirk about me, and (gasp) even likes me for it. He is probably enamoured with my eyebrows too. 🙂

What a precious God we serve.

OK, I am seriously musing now. My intention was simply to post a happy birthday greeting to Jenna. And to tell her that I miss her eyebrows. I miss her.

I cuddled the two younger boys in my big king sized bed this morning. As we lay there, the youngest piped up and expressed something a friend told him at church this weekend. He thought it was weird to celebrate the birthday of a little girl who is not getting older here on earth. I told him that we are not celebrating how old she is, we are celebrating that she WAS born, she WAS here, we were blessed to have her.  (We celebrate Christmas, don’t we?) I went on to tell the boy that just about everything is weird about losing a little girl so young. Her things are here, she is not. Her friends are growing up before our eyes, she is conspicuously absent. There is nothing normal about that.

I suspect there are people who think we are making too much of a fuss on Jenna’s birthday. Whatever. We would be remembering her today anyway. I’d rather do it with laughter and ice cream and friends, than alone in sackcloth and ashes.

So, we celebrate. We praise God for a little girl who danced into our lives and sprinkled laughter and love and plenty of pink into our home. We miss her, but we are glad that she came.

Happy birthday, my sweet little Jenna girl.



11 responses to “She talks with her eyebrows

  1. Happy birthday Jenna, and Happy Jenna’s Birthday to all of you.

  2. Happy Birthday Jenna!

    Always praying!!!


  3. Sumi,
    I love to hear about Jenna and celebrate her life with you. I will never forget her and I didn’t get to know her as a toddler so I love to hear about all the little details about your sweet girl. It is bittersweet. It is bitter we don’t have her here with us but sweet to think of all the precious moments when she was here. You are focusing on the sweet and thanking God for knowing her by celebrating her life. You have touched my life so deeply and I hope all this babbling makes sense. Mostly I just want you to know I care and think you are are an awesome lady. (((hugs))

  4. Oh Sumi…Happy Birthday Jenna! Celebration between a King and His princess. How beautiful that sight must be.

  5. Thank you for sharing. This blessed me greatly. Blessings on your birthday celebrations for sweet Jenna!

  6. Thank you for sharing your wonderful memories of Jenna. Happy Birthday, Jenna.

  7. a little late, but happy birthday to Jenna. Thank you for sharing your Jenna. It is healing for others to hear your story.

  8. I checked in a bit late, but just wanted to say that I’m sure she had a wonderful birthday in heaven. I think it is wonderful to celebrate her life here on earth and her continued life for evermore.

  9. Happy birthday, sweet Angel Jenna. :o)

    HUGS to you, Sumi. These special days are always so hard.

  10. Hi
    You don’t know me..I follow Stellan’s blog and through it I got to Timothy’s and then to yours. I have been reading through your posts about your Jenna. My heart simply breaks for you. I too am Christian and praise God that you had Him to carry you through this time. His peace is so apparent in all you write. I have 3 sons as well (though they are all grown and married now) and 6 years after we thought our family was complete, we added our beautiful daughter Melody. I too had a lifelong desire for a daughter and all that entailed and at the very beginning of my pregnacy with her I felt the Lord impress upon my heart while reading in Psalms that He was going to give me the desires of my heart and I knew from that moment on my daughter was on her way. She was also born in July. On the 24th to be exact. Her daddy and her three older brothers and I were all quickly wrapped around her little finger as well. She was NOT a girly girl (though she “looked” like one), haha but a tomboy all the way who excelled in sports and kept quite busy with them. She married last summer in a BEAUTIFUL wedding ceremony (preformed by our youngest son who is a minister) and moved 1000 miles away from us all to the very border of Texas. Her husband is a dairy farmer and this is where they moved their dairy. We live in California…..I have struggled with her being so far away from me. I miss her more than I imagined I would. I miss her at family gatherings and when I see her other friends around etc. I am sooo thankful for all the Lord’s done in our lives, and for the peace He’s given me dealing with this new turn in our road. I believe He lead me to your blog today. You inspire me…..I will pray for you and your family. May the Lord bless you and keep you…..Debbie

  11. Belated happy birthday to Jenna… I’m sure each and every day in heaven is happier than the day before, if that’s even possible…I can only imagine it. I enjoyed reading about Jenna and how
    you celebrated her birthday.

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